What Are Cognitive Distortions?
Cognitive distortions are inaccurate, exaggerated thought patterns that reinforce negative emotions. They're not a sign of weakness or mental illness — they're common to almost everyone. Once you can name them, they lose a lot of their power.
Common Distortions to Watch For
- All-or-nothing thinking: "I missed one workout — I've completely failed."
- Catastrophizing: "I made a mistake. I'm going to get fired. My life is ruined."
- Mind reading: "They didn't reply — they must be angry at me."
- Overgeneralization: "This always happens to me. I never get anything right."
- Emotional reasoning: "I feel like a failure, so I must be one."
- Should statements: "I should be over this by now. I shouldn't feel this way."
- Personalization: "My friend is in a bad mood — it must be something I did."
- Discounting positives: "That went well, but it was just luck."
How to Challenge a Thought: Step-by-Step
- 1 Catch the thought Notice when you're feeling a sharp drop in mood. Ask: "What just went through my mind?" Write it down before it slips away.
- 2 Name the distortion Which pattern does it fit? You don't need a perfect label — just naming it creates distance: "There's that all-or-nothing thinking again."
- 3 Gather the evidence What facts support this thought? What facts contradict it? A thought is not a fact — treat it like a hypothesis to be tested.
- 4 Consider the alternative What would you say to a close friend who was having this thought? Often we give others the compassion we refuse to give ourselves.
- 5 Write a replacement thought Not a forced positive — something realistic and kinder. "I made a mistake, and I can learn from it" instead of "I'm terrible at everything."